Jeremiah's Lament

So this week's lectionary has the pastor preaching on Following Christ. He is pretty good at giving me a quarterly spreadsheet with sermon scriptures and sermon titles; however, sometimes a little more fleshing out needs to happen as I am planning the rest of the elements of worship.  The running worship planning joke has me coming into his office toward the beginning of the week and asking what he's preaching on Sunday.  His weekly reply, "Jesus."  Each week I just smile.  How can I argue that?   Preaching Jesus is a pretty good thing.  Well, this week I texted the weekly question awaiting his response, just hoping I could say, "No, it's following Jesus."  But I didn't get my chance.  Oh well.

All that aside, as I read through the lectionary readings for Sunday I was struck with the Jeremiah passage.  Too often as Christians we think following Jesus means life will be easy.  Unfortunately, it gets preached that way sometimes, not Christ as one who carries us through the tough times of life but Christ who makes everything sunshine and rainbows and prosperity for His followers.  Contrary to scripture for sure, but a whole lot easier to market than "Carry your cross."  As if we have to market Christ...

Anyway, Jeremiah is following God's instructions to a T. He's speaking the words given, and he's making a lot of enemies.  By the time we get to chapter 20, he has been beaten and put into stocks.  He is sick and tired and angry with God.  This monologue is loosely based on Jeremiah chapter 20 with reference back to his calling in chapter 1.

Jeremiah’s Lament

Adapted from Jeremiah 1:4-19;  20:7-14

Really, God? Really?

This is how You treat your people?

You lied to me!

You forced me to serve You.

“Before I formed you, I knew you.”

“You are not too young.”

“I have placed my words in your mouth”

“I appoint you over nations and kingdoms”

Well, that’s just great.

You know what they did, God?

They beat me!

They put me in stocks!

The priests!  The ones who are supposed to be on your side!

And everyone is laughing, God.

I’m a giant joke, a laughingstock.

I’m speaking your word, and I get insulted.

I’m tired of it. I’m done.

But every time I try not to speak,

Every time I try to just shut up and sit back, live a quiet life, 

I can’t.

Your word, it’s like fire in my bones.

I can’t contain it. It just comes spilling out.

Even as they ridicule me, 

As my so-called friends plot against me, waiting for me to slip up,

I find myself the proclaimer again.

 “Give praise to the Lord!

 He rescues the needy from the hands of the wicked.”

I know you are by my side.

But, God, I’m tired.

Just do away with these people already.

I thought following you was going to be easy.

I know, I know.  You told me from the beginning it wouldn’t be.

But, really, God, I’m with You.  I’m on your side.

It just shouldn’t be this hard.

My whole life is nothing but pain.

In all honesty, I wish I’d never been born.

The Freezer

During the season of Lent we set aside time for confession during both of our services.  The format varies each week, depending on what else is going on in the service  (which my ADD worship self appreciates) . Sometimes we use scripture for our call to confession, prayer, or assurance of pardon. Sometimes we use a litany for one of these elements of worship. Other times we have a silent time of confession. Occasionally, the choir will sing a prayer of commitment or lament for our sinfulness.  Having come from a church background that never really did confession during worship, I have really come to appreciate this time.  In fact, I am pretty sure we need to do it a little more often outside of the Lenten season.  We do, occasionally, but probably not often enough. But that is another post.

This week our call to worship was a parable that was adapted from a real-life illustration by Max Lucado.  In this case, I anthropomorphised the freezer in question. The parable was read as a call and was followed by a time of silent confession and a corporate prayer.   If you want to check out the original, you can find it in The Applause of Heaven by Max Lucado, Word Publishing, 1990. pps. 122-5.

The Freezer

A Parable Adapted from the writings of (and with great apology to) Max Lucado

Once upon a time there was a freezer.  But this was not just any freezer.  This was the Freezerdyne 7000, the crowning glory of all refrigeration.  Inside this freezer was a treasure trove of wonderful things: beautiful cakes, juicy steaks, ice cream, soups, vegetables, breads, and seafood just waiting to be used.  Did I mention seafood? The seafood is pretty important.  Well, anyway, the Freezerdyne 7000 was a thing of beauty, and everyone admired it.

Well, one day the freezer became unplugged. It didn’t mean to get unplugged. It just got really busy, too busy to notice that the plug was slowly working its way out of its power source.  But, hey, this was the Freezerdyne 7000, with the top energy efficiency around, how much power did it really need?  It was pretty powerful on its own.  So, the Freezerdyne kept going, unplugged, never noticing that the wonderful things it held were now becoming rotten.  All of that seafood and meat and milk products and vegetables had become one soupy, revolting, nauseating mess.

One day the designer got ready to use some of the wonderful things in the Freezerdyne.  He opened it.  And saw it. And He smelled it.  Did I mention the seafood? Well, the Freezerdyne, realizing that it was now full of some really smelly stuff, was embarrassed, so the freezer decided to do something about it.  He shut that door as fast as he could, so the designer couldn’t see. Then, he got a nice, warm, soapy rag and began to clean himself. He scrubbed his outsides until he shined.  He even got a nice waxing.  Surely, there was not a prettier freezer in all of refrigeration.  However, when he opened his shiny door, he still smelled of rotting seafood and meat.

Next, he thought some friends would make things better.  So he took his newly polished self and invited all the neighborhood appliances over for a party.  They discussed politics and poetry and all things mechanical.  They washers dropped the spin cycle, and all the appliances danced. The blenders really mixed it up.  It was the party of parties.  But, when the freezer decided to open his door, the party was over. The other appliances couldn’t get out of there quickly enough.

Finally, the freezer decided that he just needed a little status.  He earned himself a nice degree in multi-brand refrigerator religions and added a Brr to his name. His new status warranted a new wardrobe, so he went shopping at places like Abercrombie and Fridge and made sure he looked really good.  He was careful to be seen in all the right places, and no one could miss him in his shiny stainless steel convertible.  However, in spite of his new status and amazing new wardrobe, he felt empty. 

           

Now, he knew he wasn’t really empty. He knew he was full of a lot of rotten stuff.  You see, hard as he tried, the smell of his interior never really went away. In fact, the more he tried to cover the smell up, the worse it became.  It was getting so bad that he could smell it even with his door closed.  And worse yet, he didn’t know how to fix it.  So, out of ideas, he did the only thing he knew to do:  he talked to his designer. He opened his doors and let the designer see inside of him.  And he let the designer, who had known about the rotten mess all along, do the cleaning.  And then the designer filled the freezer with wonderful new things and warned him about the dangers of becoming unplugged.

So, clean again, full of the wonderful things the designer had placed in him, the freezer knew he was fulfilling his purpose.  And he was happy. In fact, the Freezerdyne 7000 was downright joyful, so joyful he couldn’t keep quiet.  He told everyone about his new life and his amazing designer. And, from that day forward, the Freezerdyne 7000 was watchful, making sure to always remain plugged into his power source.

We Meet Together

In trying to remember what my inspiration was for writing this call to worship, I am not sure if it was an election season, or if the sermon was on unity that day, or if it was independent of any other prompt.  I do know that God calls us to worship together in spite of all of our differences. He doesn't give us the option of being "Lone Rangers" in our faith; scripture calls us repeatedly to meet together.

I was asked on the spur of the moment this week to share in our early service why it is important to worship corporately.  My first response was that it is great practice for eternity.  Scripture paints a beautiful picture of worship around the throne. Make no mistake, we will worship together for eternity with saints of all backgrounds and nationalities, worshiping as one.  There will be no place for putting people on pedestals. God alone will be the focus of our worship.

 I thought secondly of the fact that, in any given worship service, there are people who are on the mountaintop and others that are in the valley. In the midst of worship we get to acknowledge that God is the God of both the mountain and the valley.  We need to worship in the midst of both.  We need moments of rejoicing and thankfulness and moments of remembrance of those times God has brought us through.  We need opportunities as well to cry out to God in our hurts and for the hurts of others.  In doing so,we need to be able to reach out to those around us and say, "I have been there, and God was with me, even when I didn't feel Him."

Obviously, this is not an exhaustive theology of corporate worship, just a couple of spur of the moment thoughts.  This is a continuing discussion for us in worship. I would love to hear your thoughts.

We Meet Together

(A call to worship for two readers)

      We meet here each week.We meet here to worship.

            We meet here to worship together: 

             Young

             Old

             Male

             Female

2          Wealthy

            Not so wealthy

2          Southerners

1          Northerners

2          And those from other countries.  We meet here to worship together:

     

1          Students and educators

2         Musicians and mathematicians

1         Soldiers and Salespersons

           Democrats, Republicans, and Independents

Both:  together.

1         The quiet and the boisterous, together

2         The staunch believer and the skeptic, together

1        We meet united by the greatness of God’s love for all humanity.

2        We meet united by a love that wishes that none should perish.

1        We meet united by grace and mercy.

2.       We meet united by the Holy Spirit Who brings us peace, healing, and love which reaches across the  barriers  which divide us to make us one body.

1        We meet here each week.

2        We meet here to worship.

Both:  We meet here to worship together.

    Come, let us all worship and bow down together.

    Let us kneel together before the Lord, our maker.

     Both:  Together, let us worship.

What if?

I really have been lousy about writing regularly. I realized today that I really haven't done any blogging since my youngest was born, which may tell you exactly how busy she keeps me. I don't have a lot of time to sit and reflect and write, except maybe in my office.  You would think ministry would be much more conducive to reflection and meditation, but a lot of time it is not.  I don't get to sit and think as much as I would like. Actually, extrovert as I am, sitting and reflecting alone is not first on my list anyway. I would much rather converse my way through ideas with a group of others.  However, when I do get a chance to reflect, a lot of my musings and reflections get written into worship materials: poems, readings, liturgies. So, I decided maybe I would put some of that on the blog for anyone else to use or to give feedback. I am going to start putting them up little by little, as time allows.  I will start with something I am working with for this week's service:

This is a reading in three parts: one as part of the call to worship, one in tandem with the scripture reading and the song "Your Grace Still Amazes Me", and one preceding (or following, not sure yet) the sermon, which is titled, "When the Church Is the Church".

What if we really praised?

I mean, really praised

Not just going through the motions

Not just for an hour on Sunday or on a special occasion

Or when things are going particularly well

What if we praised Him in the midst of the valley?

What if we saw God’s hand at work around us at all times and praised Him?

What if we recognized that every day is His, no matter what it brings?

What if we praised Him in the midst of our families? Or our workplace?

Would it change our lives?

Would we be different people?

Would others notice?

What if we really praised?

What if we truly were amazed?

I mean, really amazed

Completely in awe of Who God is, of His love and His mercy

What if, day by day, we realized just how ugly and scarred and sinful we really are

Not were, but are

And if we really understood the holiness of God, the otherness of God,

The purity and power, and the perfection

And realized that He, in all his purity, took our sins on Himself

And died

And that, in His resurrection, He made being in relationship with Him a reality

And that God would want to walk with us, ugly, scarred, and sinful

Would we look at others the same way?

Would we continue to judge their sinfulness or their worthiness?

Could we be apathetic to their hurts and needs?

Would it change our lives?

Would we be different people?

Would others notice?

What if we truly were amazed?

What if we truly followed?

I mean, truly followed

Not just on Sundays, but every day of the week

Not just in words, but in our actions, all of them

No matter where He asked us to follow

No matter what it might cost us

What if every decision we made, at home, at work, at school, in the world was informed by our faith?

What if every action we took was based on our love of God and others?

What if we followed without regard to our pocketbooks or public opinion?

What if we went even if no one was willing to go with us?

Would it change our lives?

Would we be different people?

Would others notice?

What if we truly followed?

A drop of dew

But what things were gain to me, these I have counted loss for Christ. Yet indeed I also count all things loss for the excellence of the knowledgeof Christ Jesus my Lord, for whom I have suffered the loss of all things, and count them as rubbish, that I may gain Christ and be found in Him -Philippians 3:7-8
So, the sermon was out of Philippians. We were celebrating communion, and I was singing a song I have sung dozens of times in church and at Campbell functions. It is a beautiful song, and today it hit me like never before.

Your broken form upon the cross, Your holy love expressed,
Stirs a passion in my soul, calling me to give my best

No sacrifice I could give for you could match what you've given me
For my everything is but a drop of dew, and Calvary is the sea
Calvary is the sea.

If I could take the love I feel and capture it with words
More than what my heart could give is so much less than You deserve

If I should ever doubt Your love, my only wish would be
That You would keep Your rugged cross etched upon my memory

No sacrifice I could give for you could match what you've given me
For my everything is but a drop of dew, and Calvary is the sea
Calvary is the sea.

I am not sure why the song hit me today, but I almost didn't make it through, very unusual for me. Maybe it was the funeral I attended yesterday. Maybe the other stressers in my life. Whatever it was, I was just struck with such a realization of how little I do for my Savior and all He has given for me. It is easy for me to be complacent and to feel all right working in my little church office, proud of myself for following God's call. Yet, I know that He is calling me to step out more, to not be comfortable. I know that whatever I do cannot earn His sacrifice or make God love me more, but I also know that I have to follow that calling...not sure exactly how that plays out right now. I just know today was a reminder...one of those random God moments which gives as many questions as answers.

thinking out loud

Ok, so I am sitting here in the house having a pretty cruddy evening after a phone call to my dad, who is not doing so well lately, and after speaking to a friend who is currently at the hospital awaiting some test results. I am watching Million Dollar Baby, which is probably not helping my frame of mind at all. I probably just need to sit and have a good cry, but I am not much of a crier, and it makes me mad when I do. I am sure this is not at all a healthy way to be, and, in all honesty I probably need to get out of the house and be social, but it is late, and no one to hang with at this hour. And so I am writing. Perhaps all the CUDS journaling has rubbed off on me after all.

I haven't blogged in a while, mostly due to busyness. Things are going well. The kids are good. The boy has started cub scouts. The baby is starting to sit and is very close to crawling. The girl is doing ok in school and has started to hang with some of the grad students at church, so she has a social life again. Hubby is Hubby, or rather Hubby on computer courses (you know, this is your Hubby, this is your Hubby on computer courses). It's a funny thing: after all these years of him teasing me about being an overachiever, he is mad as fire to not be making an A in his Spanish class. And he hates our computer. HOwever, new computers require funding which is not really available at this moment (something about a baby and a girl in college...)So, I come in regularly to find him yelling at the computer and calling it names. I am really enjoying the church I serve. I am excited about some of the things we are doing. I love the people I am working with and for (wow,ended that sentence with TWO prepositions!). I am starting to meet some other colleagues in town, which is cool. However, I am realizing that my extroverted self needs a social life. One of my favorite lunch friends (aside from staff and/or my Hubby) is moving today.She is off to OH to finish her PhD in microbiology, stuff beyond my understanding. My circle of buddies is getting geographically wider and immediately smaller (again!). Sad day.

I am extraordinarily stressed about my extended family right now. I have a dad who is dealing with a multitude of physical and emotional issues, a sister who is dealing with family issues, an aging grandmother, a brother who is just out of touch with the rest, and a wonderful sister who is in the middle of all of it as caregiver to all. I don't know how she does it. I love her dearly,and I know God has her where she needs to be right now, but I know she has to be stressed, because I am far away from them, and I am stressed. Maybe I am more stressed because I am here, but I also know myself well enough to know that I am not nearly the patient nurturer that my sister is. Maybe God knew what He was doing when He kept me away from the rest...imagine that.

Oh well, enough whining. God is good. I love my life, bumps and all...

Home alone

Ok, I am not really home alone. I am currently typing and listening to Rebecca alternate between talking to her toy and falling asleep. She has a very definite going to sleep pattern which consists of sticking her thumb in her mouth and rolling over to her side then rolling to the other side and sticking her other thumb in her mouth. She will do this and fuss a little and fall asleep. However, she is laying on her play mat, and I stuck some batteries in a part of it which has never had batteries before. So, everytime she rolls over she kicks the mat, and it starts a light and music show. So, she sings back to it. It is very cute.

She is also very much occupying herself, which gives me time to type. Normally that would not be enough to give me a few moments, but my two other children are gone, Melissa for the summer and Christian for the next couple of weeks. Jamie is working nights, so it is unusually quiet around the house. I have already done my workout, and I am fixing to ruin it by eating homemade blueberry cobbler. I have folded clothes, and now I am typing despite the fact I have nothing really to say. And now she cries, and it is time to go...good thing I had nothing to say!